by Mary Jessica Hammes
December 08, 2010

Elita Kalma thought breastfeeding would be easy. Her own mother had breastfed her for 18 months, and she had the support of her family. When Kalma was pregnant, her mindset was simple: “You get pregnant, you have a baby, you breastfeed.”

But then her son Miles was born, and she had the kind of early breastfeeding experiences that are so familiar to many mothers: Miles did not latch.

No one at the hospital checked the latch before she was discharged. Before long, her nipples were bleeding and blistered and Miles was losing weight. Her son’s pediatrician became focused on helping Miles gain weight, but never once discussed breastfeeding solutions with her.

The first six weeks were “really, really tough,” says Kalma, a library director in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida. But she was determined. Her husband, a high school teacher, encouraged her to keep going, keep trying, and helped her to find a solution. Eventually, she found what she needed—video instructions on proper latching on the popular video-sharing community, YouTube.

Three years later, Miles is still breastfeeding, though Kalma has documented recent signs of weaning on her hugely popular blog, Blacktating, which is devoted to chronicling the news, issues, and experiences of black women and breastfeeding.

When she started the blog in April of 2008, she expected “maybe a handful of friends to read it,” she says. Today, the website receives nearly 30,000 pageviews a month.

“At first, I was hoping to find other black moms who were breastfeeding and create a community via the blog the way I’d seen other bloggers do it,” she says. During those early weeks of breastfeeding, while constantly searching for answers online, she noticed something: blogs devoted to black mothers who breastfeed were scarce. Of the two she found, one became defunct and the other stopped updating.

“Elita is a trailblazer in the field of blogging as it relates to black mothers and breastfeeding,” says Kiddada Green, founder and president of the Black Mothers’ Breastfeeding Association.  “I have not come across a blog quite like hers.  She keeps mothers abreast on important issues.  And most importantly, she forces the readers to think about breastfeeding and black families.  That alone highlights the issues of breastfeeding disparities and brings forth a positive change towards improving breastfeeding rates for black families.”

As cited in a 2010 report from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), in the U.S., non-Hispanic black mothers are the least likely to breastfeed. According to the National Immunization Study, among those surveyed, 54 percent of non-Hispanic black women are likely to initiate breastfeeding (compared with 80 percent Hispanic and 73 percent non-Hispanic white).

Research suggests that one possibility for the low breastfeeding rates among non-Hispanic black women is “the lack of culturally relevant information and images of non-Hispanic black women breastfeeding.” Kalma says her blog is an attempt to rectify this. “I have talked a lot on my blog about how there needs to be more images of black women breastfeeding used in books and campaigns.”

Blacktating.com is a hugely popular blog for a number of reasons. Kalma’s writing has a friendly, conversational tone, but also a journalistic bent. She uncovers links between researchers and formula companies; keeps track of which major companies are violating the World Health Organization’s International Code of Marketing Breast-milk Substitutes; and critically interprets research data and media coverage.

Kalma recently became a Certified Lactation Counselor and is a recognized authority on social media. She recently spoke to members in the health care industry at the Third Annual Black Mothers’ Breastfeeding Association conference, where she gave a lecture on the importance and use of social media, like breastfeeding blogs, to connect with other mothers, especially black women.

“Social media is really the way to reach black moms,” she says, adding that she has the most engagement with black mothers using Twitter.

“Elita’s methods of reaching black women are important for increasing the breastfeeding rates,” says Green. “Social media allows mothers to be reached at any time and any place… This is very beneficial for mothers who do not have a breastfeeding support group, or who can’t find a group that they feel comfortable with.”

Kalma has let her blog evolve over time. When it started, she “didn’t want it to be a personal blog,” adding, “As time has gone on, I have showed more about my personal life, my personal breastfeeding story. I think that’s important. It helps people relate to me and trust me.”

And people do trust her. Whenever she learns that a child has nursed because of her blog, or whenever she’s able to help a new mom successfully troubleshoot breastfeeding issues, there is a moment of triumph, of, “Yes! I made a difference for at least one person,” she says.

“I’m not in the trenches, but I feel like I do my part,” says Kalma. “Sometimes I really wish I could do more.”

Mary Jessica Hammes is an Athens, Georgia-based writer, trapeze instructor, knitter, gardener, comic book enthusiast, and hula hooper. She is mom to Tommy.